How to Deal With Loneliness During Holidays
There are a lot of expectations around the holidays. They’re portrayed as joyful, family-centered events, but for many people, they bring feelings of loneliness instead. Whether due to distance from loved ones, loss, strained relationships, or pre-existing depression, the holidays can highlight what’s missing rather than what’s present.
Loneliness during this time can feel even sharper because of societal pressures to be cheerful and surrounded by others. Even in a crowd, you might feel disconnected or out of place.
Recognizing Loneliness During the Holidays
Signs of holiday loneliness may include:
Avoiding holiday gatherings because they feel overwhelming.
Feeling left out when seeing others celebrate.
Isolating yourself from others.
Having doubts about your worth or social skills.
Increased sadness or anxiety.
Difficulty enjoying traditions or finding meaning in them.
Chronic loneliness has some surprising symptoms. While you might think that loneliness would make you want to see people, chronic loneliness tends to make people isolate more as they begin to doubt their social skills. Recognizing these beliefs and challenging them is particularly important during the holidays.
Practical Solutions to Manage Holiday Loneliness
While loneliness is difficult, there are ways to cope and create moments of connection and purpose:
Plan Ahead for Difficult Days
Anticipate the moments that might feel hardest, such as spending a holiday away from family or having moments where you are reminded of losses. Create a plan for how you’ll spend those times, whether it’s engaging in a favorite activity, calling someone you trust, or simply giving yourself permission to rest.
Volunteering Helps You, Too
Giving back to your community is a powerful way to combat loneliness. Volunteering at a food bank, shelter, or local event not only helps others but also provides a sense of purpose and connection.
Set Realistic Expectations
Not every holiday will be perfect. Focus on finding small moments of joy, even if the season looks different than you’d hoped. Take moments out to appreciate things that are going well and connections with people that care about you, even if they’re distant.
Reach Out to Others
Connection doesn’t have to be complicated. A simple phone call, a text, or joining a community activity can help ease feelings of isolation.
It might feel that it’s not worth getting in touch with someone if you don’t have anything to say or don’t have much time, but that’s likely not true. Even small moments of connection can make a difference when you’re feeling lonely.
Create New Traditions
If old traditions feel painful, consider creating your own. This might include cooking a special meal, exploring nature, or starting a holiday ritual that brings you peace and joy. Consider what you would like to do during the holidays, even if it’s unusual.
Prioritize Self-Care
Make time for practices that support your mental health. Exercise, mindfulness, journaling, and proper rest are all essential, especially during emotionally charged times.
Depression and Loneliness During the Holidays
Loneliness during the holidays can sometimes be a symptom or precursor of depression. Signs of depression may include:
Persistent feelings of sadness or emptiness.
Losing interest in activities you usually enjoy.
Feeling fatigued, irritable, or withdrawn.
Changes in sleep or appetite.
If you notice these signs, it’s important to take them seriously. Depression can make you feel stuck, but there are ways to address it. Sharing your feelings with a trusted person, seeking professional help, and practicing self-compassion can help lighten the burden.
Finding Purpose in the Holidays
Loneliness doesn’t have to define your holiday experience. Instead, it can be a time to reflect on what the season means to you personally.
Consider activities that feel fulfilling, such as:
Spending time in nature, exercising, doing hobbies, or catching up with friends.
Shifting your focus from negative thoughts toward gratitude and planning for activities that will make you feel good.
Reaching out to help others, whether through volunteering or acts of kindness in your community.
These small steps can help shift the focus from what’s missing to what’s meaningful.
Conclusion
Loneliness during the holidays can feel overwhelming, but there are ways to navigate this season with resilience and care. By taking small steps to connect, care for yourself, and find meaning, you can create a holiday experience that feels authentic to you.